FOREIGN NEWS
Crisis alert! Going bANANTA at BombASStic
As the BombASStic festival came to a close in our very own city of sins, Duvel, our country is also recovering from the immense joy and record-setting numbers from the festival. This year’s edition will go into the history books as one of the, if not the most successful edition yet. This was only possible because of the attendance of more than 65% of the inhabitants of our country. The lightshow which was orchestrated by Sergei Trojkavna (32) was among the most impressive shows our country has been graced with.
Additionally, this year we invited the citizens of Ananta to buy tickets for our festival and to put our hostility towards outsiders aside. The tickets were quickly sold out and we were excited to have them attend BombASStic as they are known to love music and the beach, exactly what our edition offered this year.
Unfortunately, our festival was not received well and has raised some controversy. The government supports the citizen in question, but they have not taken action yet. We do not tolerate this disrespect and have taken extensive measures. We ‘negotiated’ with the Anantian government. They were given the option to agree to a set of rules or undergo a more drastic action as having a nuclear power plant close to the border of Ananta. After slightly threatening us, they succumbed and agreed to the first set of rules, containing a ban of all Anantians in our country, suspending all invitations of their country of coming editions of BombASStic, to stop all accusations and slander towards our country and last but not least, a written and signed apology letter from the citizen. These measurements were deemed acceptable to regain the respect our citizens deserve.
Tension between Karlsbergh and Ananta is still present and only future developments will tell whether we will keep a good connection with Ananta or resort to more hostile actions or even war.
WIMPiris oversteps, Karlsbergh takes action
The nuclear sector of Karslbergh is what our country is mostly known for. We generate and provide energy not only for ourselves, but also for other countries of the UBN. This seems fitting since we generate an overabundance of energy and we do not plan on wasting said energy.
However, Impiris has lashed out at Karlsbergh in an article, making us out for a polluting beast and claiming that we bring destruction to the world. Furthermore, they scandalously disgraced the flag our country, adding elements related to the devil. They also started a cause and try to put the rest of the UBN against us. This is a low blow since they never went into conversation with us but immediately resort to action. As a reaction, the government of Karlsbergh will take Impiris to court and put them on trial for slander, defamation and conspiring against us.
A similar incident occurred with Ananta after our BombASStic festival, yet an agreement was made with their government for a disassociation between both countries and they delivered an apology letter. Although we were deeply hurt as a country by the move of Ananta after our festival, they never went as far as desecrating the flag and the pride of our nation. Karlsbergh does not tolerate this and will take immediate action.
After the trial, the government will decide whether the punishment was severe enough and will add additional penalties accordingly.
For the first time ever a Karlsberghian Miss UBN?
For the first time ever a Karlsberghian Miss UBN? "Sabrina Borisnova has a real chance"
At 1 o'clock tonight the Miss UBN pageant 2021 starts in Pheobe, Impiris. Miss Karlsbergh Sabrina Borisnova (22) will participate for Karlsbergh and is widely tipped as a contender for the coveted crown.
Meanwhile, Borisnova has already had a day full of preparations. "Today we had rehearsals with a general dress rehearsal at the end," says Svetlana, director of the Miss Karlsbergh Committee, who supports Sabrina with good advice. "I do this via Whatsapp because personal contact is no longer possible as the candidates stay in a separate, closed hotel."
Svetlana expects tonight's show to last about three hours. "That is long, but then there are also quite a few commercial breaks in it. First, the 90 contestants are introduced, but early in the show that number is reduced to 16. One candidate as public favourite, 15 based on the jury's votes. They parade in an evening dress and each have to answer a question from the presenter. Those who make it to the last five are asked a more complex question, which eventually leads to only three girls. They each get headphones and have to answer the same question.Partly based on that, it is then decided who gets the title. So it really is more than just about looks. "
"Top ten would already be very nice for Sabrina," says Svetlana, who of course hopes for more. "The competition is strong, but over the past few days I've caught very positive echoes everywhere. And this year it is exactly forty five years ago that a Karlsberghian made it to the final five at Miss UBN. That was Dunya Kondakov."
UBN’s Rugby Champion
The event we have been waiting four years for is behind us. The UBN's rugby tournament. We excel in rugby with our class players. It is a sport we are built for - tough, competitive and hands-on. It suits us better than cricket, which is just a bit too soft for us.
Ananta and Karlsbergh have always been good friends, until this year. Where they first wanted to put us in a bad light with our festival and then proclaimed that we lost 15-0 at cricket. While we only lost by a mere 1-0, contrary to what they declared with their fake news.
So, as expected, we took revenge in a playful manner. We won with flying colours against Ananta. It is no secret that we have the best team in the world, but against Ananta, that difference became clear. They did not stand a chance from minute one of the match.
Fortunately, both teams were able to shake hands after the match. There were no hard feelings on either side. On our side, there was mostly euphoria about being rugby world champions for the 10th time in a row.
